Today was supposed to be a happy day cos i can finally change my hp today. BUT,i got fever n flu!AGAIN!!!I dun know if i would still go n change my hp but now i'm busy feeding myself with Panadol so that the fever would just go away. :(

Somehow,deep down, i feel that u r running away from something. running away not from your responsibilities but possibly what u r or have to face now.Maybe u would say it's not running away,it's cos u just care less. mayb so. but things wun just happen by leaving them as they are.When things progress to a point whereby we can't seem to control or beyond our expectations,it's human nature to run away. But the situation will stay.

I'm running away from reality now, too.Or rather choose not to see what is in front of me.To u,i may be wrong, i dun understand.But when would u open up to your own self n face the person within?When would u learn to be not so self-defensive n moved on?What r u running away from?

Face what u fear with courage,n u will cease to fear. I will.

I pray for all my band members that they can and will survive the whole week of band practices from next monday onwards. that they will use their determination and will to accomplish something together.

Haha,i also hope i can survive next week with no lunch. haha!I think my stomach will growl during lessons :P

Haha, i love having pictures on my blog!

Ok,I'm losing it. I'm losing what i need to have as a band teacher. I dun know y.Or rather i do know y, but i refuse to face it cos i'm not ready to do so.There was a period of time when there were so many things going thru my mind, trying to find solutions for the best of both worlds. I thought that period was over, at least for these 2 weeks. But now it's back. I wish i can "invite" pple to leave,cos it's really making me angry. Y should leeway be made when in the 1st place everyone is told what is in store for them? I hate to be put in a difficult position but they r always doing this to me. N in the end, at the end of the day, i get understanding neither from the individual nor the group.

Twins has become history.

An incident happened recently that made me rather angry n discouraged. The mere thought of it made my blood boil. I swear if the person said the same thing to me again, i would definitely scold him, even if it would affect the relationship.

Now thinking of it pissed me off. It may seem to be insignificant but to think that all ur effort put in to fight for something became someone's credit, how would u feel?U get all the shit n blacklisting, got what u want, n then it turned out that it was believed to be someone's credit.

Those who have not tried fighting with higher authority, u try the next time u go n work. Damn pissed off.

I was happy for Joshua(band) that his results for common tests were better, though he said it was still below his expectations. As for the rest of the members who need to see me weekly, i sincerely hope that they will buck up. Haha, went to Pop bookstore with mish n we spent like half an hour choosing a chem reference book. Made the lady opened 2 books for her to browse thru. I wanted to buy my Nanny mia game but too many pple came in so i decided to buy it the next time. Aiya, that mish was still tempting me to buy the game. After half an hour of browsing, we decided to buy this colourful book but her card got rejected,so used mine lor.HAha. THEN, this dear girl of mine dun want to bring the book around so she "deposited" it in my staffroom. Haha. I can see that she is working,more diligently than last year n it's real comforting to know that.

But that Hayden was really the death of me. I whacked his head twice with my notebook during our session. My blood pressure really went up man! I'm so worried abt his academics.

Sigh, i dun ask for much, but just self-discipline, doing what u need to at the right time, that's all. As long as u have given ur 101 %, the rest is sometimes beyond our control. That's what exams r all about.

Going for my dip. with ABRSM soon.

Went to CNB with my class today for Learning Journey. It was kinda fun.

Mr Low was obessessed with his Panadol theory. Joshua said we should have sold d**gs for the Street Market as it was such a lucrative trade.

I think the presentation was ok and i learnt quite a lot. The best part was there was tea break n a bag for the students. There was like my favourite eclair n curry puff n i could not eat cos i got cold n bad throat :(

Haha, the girls n myself made fun of Teddy Bear Eric cos he was on the phone the minute we came out of the seminar room for tea break n was so busy he had to eat as he talked. So i called him the "Boss".

Btw Mr Eric Chan is the Kungu Panda of the class!!**Clap**

Hmm,after i have fully recovered next week, i will need to settle some discipline issues with some pple in the class.

I really need to get well!!

My sore throat is better after taking the powerful lozenages. But now i got my 2nd most HATED illness: Headache!!! It's not just any headache, its a POUNDING headache!!!

My nose is still running, my eyes r so watery n i think a cough is coming. My old bones r aching.

Pls. Let me get well soon. I have so many things to do, next week is the start of all my added-on consultations n weekly review. Pls, i need all the good health i can get.

Know who these people are? They are people who had made my 2007 beautiful. They are the people whom i have grown to love and care n will miss.

The most precious gift they had given me as a band, is the video clip on them playing "Fairy Tale"

For the 1.5yrs we spent together, i did not tell them that i love them. I told them i would miss them terribly when i left for China last yr. But ever since then, I had not told them i love them. But i know i do.

Lately I passed by my alma mater everyday cos it is part of my journey home after oral exams.As I looked at my juniors wearing the familiar uniform, I felt a sense of pride.

I suddenly remembered what my Econs tutor used to tell me: U dun find JC students cute anymore. How true! But y then am I here? What do I really wish to accomplish?

For the rest of the journey, I kept thinking abt this question. At long last, I got the answer. I wanted to impart what my teachers had given me to my students. For example, my English teacher in Pri School taught us the Edward de Bono 7 thinking hats, as well as CORT. I dun think schools have these as part of their curriculum but I really benefited from these.

I’m sorry if I sound arrogant but since young, my parents gave me the best education. Although I believe that there are talents everywhere but I also believe that somehow SAP schools or the top schools are what they r for a reason. Although I dun know what these reasons r,but I had benefited from their prog.

The gap between elitist colleges and others narrows at the JC level. I think my students can also be of top 5 caliber. In fact, some have proven so. What do they need to possess? From what I observed from my 80 pointers, the common trait is consistency, the ability to question, and the quest for knowledge. My CG of 2006 also had this trait. They were hungry for knowledge. They wanted to learn more, they read up, they encouraged and shared with one another their knowledge. In the process, they also tested their own understanding.

Though I did not do very well for my A levels(there were times when I doubted my ability cos my results were real bad in JC compared to my classmates), I know I went beyond my own limits in my 2 years in HJC. I always had my tutorials done no matter how hectic life was. For 2 yrs, I did not go out with my friends cos I knew I need the time to study. I know to many students now, it’s really like no life. But so what if u have lots of “life” n at the end of the day, u screwed up ur A levels? Ur cert is not going to show how colourful ur life in JC is, it’s just going to reflect ur results, not forgetting ur CCA. Hmm, I got A2 for my CCA grade man! Haha!

Mayb I did not accomplish the part of imparting the knowledge to my students, I will try harder. The process of teaching critical thinking is hard n dry. It really depends on whether u want to learn it or not. Hmm, now I think I know y I love PW so much. I really like this subject n KI as well.

I really really need to cheer up. I had a horrible night with a nose that ran all over the place n my most hated sore throat!!

I HATE SORE THROAT!!My day is ruined cos of this.N i felt a bit cold, not cos of the weather.

Went to see a doctor after lessons just now. N he gave me the super power lozenages.I had those when i fell sick during last yr's band camp. Real good. N he gave me a MC for tmr. But i think i wun be using it cos tmr still got oral exams plus lessons n consultation too.

I need to get well so that i can be happy again. I hate falling sick cos it always demoralizes me. :(

To many whom i had talked to, JC was not really a place which gave them fond memories, at least not in the aspect of academics. Cos there are so many to learn, so many to adapt to.I would say it is a place where it instills true discipline and not forgetting it is a gateway to Uni.

I had never liked my JC years cos it was all about studying. though competition into Uni was not so tough then, but to really qualify for Uni,it really needs a lot more. I know it is quite unusual for students not to go out for social gatherings, but do keep it to the minimum.

There is really no quick n easy way to success or good grades. The only way is to drill n practice. No matter how far behind u r in your studies, u must be determined to try n catch up with the work of the week. Things work on a weekly basis. Dun give excuses that will take time away from your studies.

I think JC is never meant to be an enjoyment.It is sheer hard work n at the end of the day, only then will we enjoy the freedom and fun Uni has to offer.

We need to move away from regurgitation and learn to think critically. Question any concepts or ideas cos it is only thru questioning that we learn.

take ur econs CT question as an example, when u were asked abt the px elasticity of SQ fares versus others. What were in ur mind then? Definition of px elasticity? How exclusive SQ is? The turnover rate of SQ planes? The services rendered n the journey to countries not offered by other high-end airlines? The consumers' aspect? The gap between the rich n the poor in our ctry vs other countries? All these play a part in ur answers. This is what JC is abt. Critical thinking n thinking from all perspective. GK as well.

The reason behind this is we need to train all of u or instill in u resilience, determination n will. If we need to break u before we can make u, we will have to do it. Mayb now u all may not understand y u r treated so harshly by some of us, but when u grow up n realise the true nature of society,u will know. In a workforce,ur actions can affect so many, ur thoughts can affect the next decision made. Tutors in Uni wun be too concerned with ur attendance, with ur homework,they wun be running after u to get ur work done cos the responsibility of learning is on u.

I'm not really sure if i have answered ur question. But no matter what, dun be discouraged. This is the beginning, n not the end. We still have the chance to correct our wrongs.

Yesterday was post Youth Day Hols. Went to Vivo for an early dinner. Walked past Page one and it was the only time when i seriously walked past it and never attempted to enter the shop. Cos i need to save $$ to go to the bookstores in HK for my shopping spree.

After dinner at the basement foodcourt, we went to Haagen Das for ICE-CREAM!!! I love their strawberry and summer berries n cream ice cream. So i tried the "Make your own sundae" with single scoops of my favourites each plus a crepe and maply syrup. Yummy!!!

Went to do market survey on my hp cos i can upgrade my hp on 29th July. Finally!! Must countdown. I want Nokia 6620, the purple one.It's so cool!! I need to sign up for the SMSMore plan cos i always overshot my sms limit.

Hmm, my weekend was spent watching TV. I missed the horror movie on fri night cos i was so tired aft oral exams that i fell asleep after the 10pm show. Watched LOTR dun know for the x no. of times, plus Ghost Whisperer and Incredible Tales(which i dun really think it's that incredible)

Had finished the lesson preparation for Term 3 and 4.Yeah!! So proud of myself. Was busied with that during the CT week. Decided to "catch" all my weaker kids and give them 1-to-1 consultation. Will be starting this thurs.

Was quite overwhelmed by all e plans Pringles n I discussed the other day:
1) Pacific Basin Music Fest
--- On e way. Got the estimated airfare today. Wld need to get the estimated cost from World Projects before i can submit my proposal
2) Esplanade Concert
---All fully booked in Mar n April next yr. Quite disappointed cos i really really wanted to have the "One Family, One Flag" concert again......

I think my greatest challenge now is the Music Fest cos i have never done it before,so i need to really plan out my admin schedule to see what i need to do. It is quite a long list. oh well, but at least i can learn something,i hope.

The next great challenge is academics of both my CG and band. I'm not too sure if the idea of meeting students with poor CT results once a week to go their study plan is useful but i hope it can act as a form of self-check and mayb a "form of stress" so that they would force themselves to study. What i am afraid of is i will have quite a handful of students and not enough time for them, cos i still need to factor in my H1 CL consultation time slots.

Oh well, will just have to try n work everything out. But i need to put the J2 as the top priority cos i owe them just that much, to monitor their academics. Oh shit, i still got to vet SGC!! Oh no, so many things to do!!! How????? Then aug still got the National Schools Songwriting Comp. Aiyo, i'm in the committee leh! I have not even distributed my Saints on Stage T-shirt to the various CCA groups!! Oh dear, this is a hectic term. :(